A Hui Hou Kākou

For every event that we do, Bacon & Lox Society members are always asked to bring something to share. We believe that community is a result of our inherent interconnectedness - we are responsible for each other. A core truth of this past summer was that if a gathering were to occur, it had to be small in order to be safe. That translated to another core truth: this year, almost two-thirds of our Creek Dinner community could only bring their absence.

This was no small or easy truth to swallow, especially during a year that was already filled with so many different challenges. How can we hold hard truths in a generous and kind way? How can weave accountability, opportunity, responsibility, and community together? How can we be gracefully awkward? By honoring each individual gift of absence from each person who would not attend. We find ways to demonstrate connection and ingenuity in how we gather. We had to find a way to gracefully dis-invite those who would be missed.

After sending the original invitation to Creek Dinner attendees, we had to make the hard decision to un-invite, just like so many others who had dreams of celebrating big in 2020. We decided then on the dis-invitations. We wanted each person to have a reminder of their selfless gift, a moment to remember that they would be deeply missed.

When I thought about creating our dis-invitation, I was thinking a lot about what our agreements are when we live in a society. If we are to benefit from the security, prosperity, diversity, and advancements of a society, what does it cost us to be a member? Sometimes, it’s taking that awkward leap of faith and kindly asking people not to come. For everyone who did not attend the Creek Dinner this year, their something-to-share was the most important gift of all. Their absence gave us the ability to still gather with a much smaller group of core creatives.

Nicole Hutnyk, from Rabbit Rabbit Crew, designed both our Creek Dinner invitation and dis-invitation, which read “A Hui Hou Kākou,” until we meet again. Nicole thoughtfully crafted the dis-invitation with hidden symbols, gifts from the core members who would be gathering, so those who would not be physically present could still share in what was brought. The honeycombs that scatter across the background spaced in small clusters like hives, reminiscent of the honeycomb tables that Will from Abundat, INC, created specifically for the covid style Creek Dinner. The teal, pink, and orange color on each design were the same bright colors of our hand-dyed napkins, menus, and the incredible in creek installation by Sarah Petryk and Joseph Moussa of Allium Floral Design and Mosaic Design Co. There’s even that tight-knit, handwoven rope that circles a cluster of flowers, the weave that always encircles our BLS community.

Every time we are able to build connections during times of isolation and when we can make difficult decisions with kindness, generosity, forgiveness, and grace, especially towards ourselves, we build our communities back even stronger. Looking forward to next year.